Thursday, October 13, 2011

As of Yet Untitled

Tonight, at Princeton Theological Seminary, was the intercultural cafe. For the first time ever 5 student groups came together to put on this event. BGLASS, AAPTS, ABS, ALS, and WC but on an amazing evening, if I do say so myself (I helped with the planning). We had an open mic portion with performances of poetry, song and spoken word. My friends, Chad and Jason, preformed a short story written by David Sedaris which was phenomenal! Pam sang Mr. Cellophane (from Chicago) and Ryan read a poem in Spanish and English. There were many other truly amazing pieces as well.

I shocked myself by emerging from my shell and sharing a truly personal piece that I have written. The reaction to it was great from my friends that were there. When I stood at the mic I felt like my heart was chilling out somewhere by my toes and even after preforming I felt like my heart my come up out of my mouth. It has been a few hours since I preformed it and I am still nervous about it. I have never done anything this personal in public before. Since it has already been shared with the world, I might as well post it here.

They tell me that twenty two is too young to write
There’s still so much you’ve yet to see
You haven’t been married
You have no kids
What could you possibly have to say?
Twenty two may be too young to write
But me, I’m learning to start living life
You don’t have to read and you don’t have to care
But I have stories that I’m going to share
The story of a scared little girl
In a cold dark world
The story of the preteen who watches her beloved Daddy
Try to end his life
On the same same night her brother pulled out a knife
The story of a ten year old who runs away from home
Only to discover that no one knows
The story of a teenage girl clinging to anyone just to feel loved
I can tell you all about the day I walked through the metal detectors
To find the D, the Y, the K, the E carved into my locker
I can tell you about being a confused teen trying to be perfect yet wanting to love
I can tell you about the outsider in high school
The one who wore long sleeves and  pants in july to hide the wounds
About the college student reflecting on love
About being different in a conservative Christian realm
Where true thoughts are repressed to avoid the backlash
I have stories about being avoided because you’re gay
When you don’t identify yourself that way
But now, now  I have new stories
Stories of acceptance and of welcome
Tales of friends and truly amazing hugs
So yes, I have stories
Stories of pain and oppression
Stories of struggle and self-hate
Stories of acceptance and victory
Stories of growth and love
But of course, They say twenty two is too young to write

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